The Ambiguously Gay Eight
by Link and Luigi
Summary: Ever seen Saturday Night Live's cartoon skit 'The Ambiguously Gay Duo'? Well we decided to write one ourselves only with the Digidestined boys. (Not to be taken seriously or get offended by.)


The Ambiguously Gay Eight

"Oh Davis, PLEASE tell me!" said Joe as he sat down on a couch and folded his legs. Davis was pacing back and forth in front of him. "Come on, Davis, sit down and tell me. Davi? Are you listening to me?"

"I can't tell you what your Christmas present is yet." Davis replied, sitting down next to Joe. "I'm just so anxious!"

Joe smiled and looked down at his feet. "La-ter!" he sang. Davis smiled as well and giggled. Just then, there was a knock at the door. Just then, the doorbell rang. Davis stood up.

"Don't go anywhere," he said.

"Don't worry, I'm not moving." Joe replied, crossing his legs the other way. Davis walked over to the door and opened the door. Izzy and Matt were standing there.

"Davis!" said Izzy as he wrapped his arms around Davis and hugged him.

"Oh, Izzy, it's been so long!" said Davis, pulling away from the embrace and shaking Izzy's hand. Then he noticed that Matt had his hands on his hips. "Don't worry Matt, it's all good."

"Watch it next time." Matt replied.

"Oh Matt, I was just being friendly." Izzy said with a sigh.

"Won't you come in?" Davis said, welcoming them into his and Joe's home. Then he paused. "Let me take your jacket." He said to Izzy as he took of his jacket for him.

"Why thank you, Davis, how kind!" said Izzy as he smiled at Davis. Matt cleared his throat. Izzy giggled and playfully pushed Matt. "Someone's a little edgy tonight!" he said with a giggle.

"Davi?" called Joe from the other room.

"Oh," said Davis with a giggle. "Come on in, you guys are the first ones here." Davis led them in. Matt looked around the house.

"I like what you did to the place," he said, nodding.

"Yes, Joe and I did it all by ourselves," Davis replied as they entered the room where Joe was sitting. "Joe, I see you didn't move."

"Of course not, Davis." Joe replied with a smile as he took a drink from a fancy wine glass and then put it down on the table next to him. "Where would I go?"

"Oh you," said Davis as he sat down next to Joe. Izzy and Matt sat down on the couch that was across from the one that Davis and Joe were sitting in.

"Did you see 'How the Heart Throbs' last night?" asked Matt suddenly, putting his hand over his heart. Izzy did the same thing has they both sighed. "It was to DIE for."

"Matt and I watched it together." Izzy explained.

"Oh, we watched some of it but then Joe fell asleep on my shoulder." Said Davis. Joe giggled and said some comment about being embarrassed but he soon got over it.

"You're embarrassing me, Davi," said Joe as he put his hand over his mouth. The four giggled incessantly for about five minutes when they were interrupted by the doorbell ringing.

"Who could that be?" asked Davis as he started to stand up but Joe put his hand on his shoulder.

"No, allow me," said Joe as he stood up.

"Why thank you Joe!" said Davis as Joe went to go and answer the door. He opened it to see Cody and TK.

"Why hello there!" said Joe, clapping his hands together. Then he put his hands on his hips. "My it's been a long time! The party is just getting started!"

"Oh good!" said TK. "Cody kept saying that we were late!"

"I just didn't want to miss anything, T." said Cody.

Joe laughed a little laugh. "Come on in, Izzy and Matt are already here." He told them as he got in between the two and took each of their hands and strutted into the other room. "Look who's here!" said Joe as he ran over to Davis and grabbed his hand.

"Cody, TK, so glad you could make it!" said Davis, hugging TK and then bending down to Cody and hugging him as well. "We were worried that you would go to that Ballet after all."

"We wouldn't miss this for the world." TK replied.

Matt and Izzy walked over as well. "Hey TK, holding up the fort with Cody?" asked Matt.

TK nodded. "You bet."

"How about you, Cody, you keeping TK in line?" Izzy asked Cody.

"He may try but I'm just a little too reckless." TK said, giggling.

"TK," said Cody in a stern voice. TK giggled some more.

"Why don't you come in the living room," said Davis. "We were just talking about 'How the Heart Throbs'."

"Oh, it was VERY cute last night." Said TK.

"That show makes me cry every time." Cody commented. "I seriously thought that Leonardo would go out with Jameson. I was so disappointed when he went with Willimina."

"Jameson is SO hot," said Izzy with a sigh.

"Izzy!" said Matt in the same stern voice that Cody had used earlier.

"Matt, don't even start," Izzy said with a laugh. "I remember quite well what you said about Washburn last night."

"But Jameson can't even COMPARE with Washburn!" Matt argued.

"You're just jealous because Washburn doesn't have as good a bod as Jameson does." Izzy said, turning around and crossing his arms. Matt put his hand on Izzy's should and Izzy couldn't HELP but smile!!

Cody suddenly started sniffing. "Is something cooking in the oven?" asked Cody. "Because it sure smells delicious. Smells the same way it smells when T. cooks for me."

"Must you always bring me up?" asked TK as he started blushing.

"I can't help it, what else should I think about in my spare time?" asked Cody.

There was a short pause. "What spare time?" TK said finally. Cody smiled.

"Well about the smell, Joe baked cookies." Davis said. "And they were the cutest little things! We wrote all kinds of little messages on them. Why don't you all have a seat while I go and get them? They should be about ready, right Joe?"

"I'll come with you, Davi." Joe said, grabbing Davis' hand. "Just in case you get burned, I'll be there to save you." Then they went off to the kitchen. The other four went into the living room and sat down. They started talking about how disappointed they were that Leonardo didn't go for Jameson.

"Jameson deserved better anyway." Said Izzy. "Leonardo wasn't his type."

"I agree, Leonardo was…icky." Matt said. Izzy leaned back on Matt's shoulder.

"Am _I _icky?" he asked, already knowing the answer.

"Of course not!" Matt replied as he started stroking Izzy on the head. 

"You two are just so cute when you're together!" said TK.

"They were truly meant to be." Cody sighed. Then he looked at TK. "Kinda reminds you of us, don't you think?" TK nodded happily.

Just then, Joe and Davis came back, each holding one side of the cookie sheet as they placed it on the table in front of everyone. Izzy squealed when he saw them.

"Oooh!!" he yelled, hopping up. "They're adorable! What does this one say on it? Oh, Davis Kido! Awww…how cute!"

"Davi, did you write that?" asked Joe as he put his hands on his hips. Davis giggled.

"Maybe," he giggled.

"This just shows how much we think alike," said Joe, picking up a cookie. "Because I did the same thing only mine says…"

"Joe Motomiya." Davis read with a sigh. With that, the doorbell rang. Davis popped out of his fantasy world. "Oh, that must be Tai and Ken. Joe, I answered the first one, you answered the second one so let's answer this one together!"

"Okay, Davi, whatever you want." Said Joe as they both walked over to the door and opened it. Tai was standing there alone. Davis and Joe's smiles dropped.

"Tai, no singles." Said Davis. "Where's your date?"

"Oh, he's in the car, getting the presents." Tai replied, pointing to Ken who was bending down provocatively. Davis and Joe nodded.

"Tai dear, I need some help!" came Ken's voice. "These presents are so heavy! I don't think I can carry them all in myself."

"Be right over, Kenneth!" Tai replied. He turned to Davis and Joe. "I'll be right back," he explained as he skipped over to Ken. He put his hands on his back. "What do you help with, Hon?"

"This one…seems to be stuck." Ken replied, looking at Tai. "We'll have to take it out together."

"Okay," said Tai as he half climbed in the car as well. Then they both emerged together while holding this miniscule little package and looking at each other as if they had accomplished something WONDERFUL!!!

"Thanks for the help, I could never have done it without you." said Ken as he started blushing. They both walked up to the door where Joe and Davis were still standing.

"What does this present say?" said Tai, looking at the present. "To Joe and Davis? That would be yours I'd have to say!" Tai giggled a little bit. "I'll have to put it under the tree!"

"How sweet of you!" said Davis. "But we said that you didn't have to bring presents!"

"We couldn't help ourselves," Ken explained. "It was the cutest little thing that we KNEW you two would love so much." The newly arrived people took off their coats. Joe and Davis gasped.

"Matching sweaters!" Joe squealed. "What a great idea!"

"Yes, we knitted them together last night." Said Tai, taking Ken's hand and smiling. "I knitted his and he knitted mine."

"Wish we had thought about that," said Davis, taking Joe's hand.

"Now come on in, the others are waiting." Said Joe, beckoning them in the house. When they reached the living room, all of the previous guests gasped and ran over to Tai and Ken.

"What cute sweaters!" said TK. "You MUST let me try it on later!"

"I'm sure they would be very adorable on you and Cody." Ken told him. "Or Tai and I could knit you two some."

"Oh would you?" asked Cody.

"Matt and I were thinking about doing that," Izzy said. "But we decided against it at the last minute."

"What an adorable shirt you're wearing," said Tai, looking at Matt's shirt. "How much does a holiday hug cost?"

"Usually I charge fifty cents but for you, it's free," Matt said, opening his arms, exposing his 'Get your holiday hugs here' shirt as he and Tai hugged.

"I have an idea," said Joe. "Let's have a big group holiday hug because those…those are priceless." He put his arm around Davis and Davis put his arm around Joe. Then they went into a big warm happy hug.

About five minutes later, they finished their hug.

"All right, who wants Eggnog?" said Davis suddenly. He walked into the kitchen and returned a minute later with four cups and eight straws. He scanned the room. "Oh dear, I thought there was only four of us here! Good thing I brought eight straws! But I only have four cups."

"Don't worry, me and Izzy don't mind." Said Matt, walking over to the tray and picking up a cup and two straws.

"Ditto goes for me and T." said Cody.

"And I don't mind if you don't mind, dearie." Said Tai to Ken.

"Why would I mind?" asked Ken. "I like it better that way. We wouldn't want to make our hosts wash extra cups, would we?" So they all sat down except for TK.

"I have no place to sit." Said TK, looking around even though there were about a gwazillion empty places.

"Don't be silly, T., you can sit on my lap." Said Cody, patting his thigh. TK smiled and sat down on Cody's lap. Cody winced. TK looked at Cody.

"You want to switch it?" asked TK as he giggled. Cody giggled too as they switched places. They all sat there, sipping their Eggnog when all of a sudden, Ken gave an exasperated sigh.

"Tai, I'm sorry to bother you but…oh dear…my hair is all messed up again."

"Don't worry, you still look beautiful." Tai replied.

Ken sighed again. "I don't FEEL beautiful." He said as he pulled a brush out from the little backpack that he was carrying around. "Could you brush it? You always brush it perfectly."

"I'd love to." Tai said, taking the brush from Ken and stroking his hair gently with it.

"I don't appreciate the way you were acting when we first arrived here." Matt said quietly to Izzy while crossing his arms. Izzy looked at Matt and frowned.

"What do you mean?" he asked.

"How you were being so friendly with Davis," Matt replied.

Izzy sighed and pushed Matt's leg. "That's just what I was being, friendly." He said. "It didn't mean anything and if I hurt you then I'm sorry." Matt looked like he was going to be mad some more but then a smile somehow got forced out.

"I don't know how you do it," he sighed. "I just can't stay mad at you when you look at me like that. So cute."

"Likewise." Izzy said, leaning his head on Matt's shoulder and sighing.

Meanwhile, Davis and Joe were both in the kitchen, preparing their dinner.

"Davi, where's the cranberry sauce?" asked Joe as he searched through the cabinets. He turned around to see Davis standing there while holding a can of cranberry sauce.

"Right here, in the can…where it belongs." Davis said as he put the can down on the counter. "Cranberry sauce belongs in the can whereas you belong…with me. In my arms." They both hugged each other and swayed to the ominous melodious Christmas carols that played in the background.

Meanwhile, in the living room…

"Truth," TK said. They were all sitting in a circle.

"Okay…hm…" Izzy thought out loud. Matt gasped suddenly and leaned over to Izzy and whispered something in his ear. Izzy laughed. "Okay, have you ever kissed a girl before?"

TK looked surprised at first. Then he started fanning himself. "Kissed a girl?" he said nervously. "What kind of absurd question is that?" For another minute or so, TK stalled until he finally gave up. "Yes, I actually did kiss Kari once…though…I didn't get the same sensation as I do when I kiss Cody."

"You better not have," Cody said playfully.

"So now it's my turn," said TK looking at the faces of the people around. "Okay, Ken, I pick you."

Ken, by this time, had two short braids hanging by his ears. "Um… truth." He said finally.

"Have you ever had a serious relationship before?" asked TK. Ken glanced over at Tai but then TK interrupted his little glance. "With a girl." Ken was obviously startled.

"A girl?" Ken said. Then he sighed and thought for a minute. "Not any that jump out at me."

"How about just a date with a girl." TK asked.

"Hm…" Ken said. "I dated Yolei once…but it didn't mean anything to me. Actually, I think that's the way that me and Tai first met! Well… REALLY met…he was out on a date with Sora or something…"

At this point, there was the sound of a triangle being rung. They all turned to see Joe holding the triangle while Davis rung it with the little metal thingy.

"Dinner time!" they called. Then they all went into the kitchen hand in hand. (No, they all weren't holding everyone's hand, they were all in pairs.) They all sat around the table and started the prayers.

"Thank the lord for the food that sits in front of us," Davis said. "And um…the love…and for Joe."

"Amen." They all said.

"Excuse me Ken, I just have to get the rolls." Said Tai as he leaned over Ken and grabbed the basket of rolls. One fell on the floor. "Oops, how clumsy of me. Let me get it." So, still leaning over Ken, Tai reached down ever so slowly to retrieve the roll. He finally sat up. "You…follow the five second rule?"

"Whatever you want, Tai, you know me," Ken replied, looking as though he would pass out.

"Davis, Joe, didn't you say that the Digimon would come?" asked Matt suddenly.

"Oh, at the last minute they canceled." Joe replied. "Can't imagine why."

"Oh and I SO wanted to see Armadillomon." Said TK with a sigh as he and Cody joined hands. 

"And I'm sure that Patamon would have…" started Cody.

TK cleared his throat. "Cody, dear," he said.

"Oh, sorry T."

Then there was a long silence while everyone continued to eat their splendid Christmas dinner. Then they finished eating. HURRAH!! After that, they all went to the tree and sat around in a circle around it.

"I have to plug it in." said Davis, standing up and walking over to the plug. "Now everyone, I'm going to put the plug in the hole. Nobody take it out. Just leave it there and don't touch it."

Everyone gave Davis the thumbs up. Then Davis…put the plug in the hole and the room lit up with Christmas light goodness. Everyone 'oooo'ed and clapped their hands.

"You really outdid yourself this time!" said Izzy, patting Davis on the leg as he sat down next to him.

"Joe helped." Davis said. After a few minutes of awing, they all looked at the presents that magically appeared under the tree when no one was looking.

"Ken, I got this present for you." said Tai, handing a small present to Ken. Ken gasped when he saw it and looked at the card.

"To my brand new shinin' light." Ken read as he sighed dreamily. "From your only one." He smiled at Tai as he opened up the present.

"What could it be?" said Matt, looking over Ken's shoulder. Ken opened it up, gasped and then closed the box. He didn't even let US see it!! HOW RUDE!!

"La-ter!" he sang to Tai. Then he pulled a box out from behind his back. "I got you a present too."

"Oh, I knew you wouldn't forget." Said Tai, taking the box and looking at the card. "To my only one from your brand new shinin' light." Tai read. "It's true strength that makes us a team." Tai opened up the box and did the very same thing that Ken had done about his present. Ken giggled like a schoolgirl.

"I knew you'd like it." Said Ken with a smile as he continued to giggle.

"So you're not going to show us?" asked Izzy impatiently. Ken and Tai giggled and laughed and shook their heads.

"All right, let's just move on to the next presents." Sighed Cody as he pulled out a small package from behind his back. "T., this one's for you. Sorry, I don't have a card."

TK took the present and hugged Cody. "You are my card," TK said. "You are my present." Then he unwrapped the package and opened up the little box with a click. There was a little piece of paper inside of it. TK at first looked confused as he read the paper. 'TK, there's something I need to ask you'. TK looked over at Cody. "Yes?" he asked.

"This is a bit difficult for me," Cody explained as he took TK's hand. "TK…we've been together for a long time…and we've really gotten to know each other really well and…um…what I want to say…will you marry me TK?"

TK gasped as tears started flowing from his eyes. "YES CODY!!" he yelled as he grabbed Cody and hugged him tightly.

Everyone else sitting around the circle wiped their eyes and cried because of the happy moment. "I've never been so happy in all my life!!" Izzy cried as he buried his face in Matt's shoulder and started crying hysterically. Matt patted Izzy on the head as he wiped a tear from his own eye.

Ken and Tai sighed with happiness as they brought each other extra close.

"It's a PERFECT ending!" sighed Davis.

"No, it's a perfect beginning." Joe purred stupidly.


End file.
